INTERVIEW WITH AUTHOR D.G. KAYE!
Please help me welcome author D.G. Kaye to Jemsbooks Blog Segment, Interview an Author. Debby is a wonderful online friend of mine whose friendship I cherish.
Thank you so much for inviting me over here today Janice, what a treat!
It’s wonderful to have you here, Debby. It’s been a long time in coming.
Please tell us something about yourself.
I’m a Canadian nonfiction/ memoir writer with 6 books under my belt and hoping to finish my 7th before this year runs away on me. All my books offer life lessons from my perspective and my own experiences. I liken myself to the Phoenix who rose above adversity from a dysfunctional childhood, a narcissistic mother, zero self-esteem and once upon a time, an extremely abusive relationship. I like to think by sharing my stories I can empower others.
I live in Toronto, born and bred. I also run my blog, which is an eclectic mash of memoir stories, articles about writing and self-publishing, book reviews, author interviews, and my occasional rant on injustices I come across. I’m also part of the Sisters of the Fey blog with 7 other authors where we share our views and knowledge about the spirituaI realm. I’m an empath and believe in angels. I also write a travel column for Sally Cronin’s Smorgasbord Invitation.
I probably should have been an investigative journalist because I’m a great sleuth when it comes to research. But I’m afraid I missed the boat on that one. I loveeeee to travel and socialize. And you’ll always find me fighting for the underdog.
Jjspina: You are an amazing woman, Debby. Out of the ashes you rose triumphant and better than ever.
When did you know that you wanted to be an author?
Now that’s a good question. I’m not sure I ever really aspired to be an author. A writer yes, as I’ve been writing since childhood, but an author was a far away dream for me. In my twenties, I began devouring books and only wondered if I’d ever gain the courage to write a book. But the years and decades passed. I wrote in journals to document the craziness in my life and later submitted a few articles to some local magazines. As my journals grew through the years and my emotional battle with my mother escalated, I began to feel the need to compile some of my stories and so I wrote my first book. Conflicted Hearts – a memoir about how growing up with a narcissistic mother affected my childhood right through to adulthood.
Jjspina: It was a good thing that you did document your life. It made a fantastic book and must have been cathartic for you to release all that angst.
How do you come up with ideas for your stories?
I think I’ve been lucky in that department because I’ve never really sat down and said, “Okay, I want to write a book, what should I write about?” Often, I’ll be doing something unrelated to writing when I get an inspiration to write on a topic. My first book, Conflicted Hearts, I knew was going to be written from the journals I kept. My 5th book I published – P.S. I Forgive You, I knew I had to write that somewhat of a sequel to an unfinished story of Conflicted Hearts, but I also knew I couldn’t write that book until my mother died. I began writing it only a few months before she died as I struggled with breaking ‘no contact’ after 7 years of finally breaking free from her hold on me.
My 3rd book. Words We Carry, is a nonfiction/memoir. I often write in a crossover of both. In that book I share stories about building self-esteem and talk about healthy and toxic relationships.
Menowhat? A Memoir was sparked by one silly night of joking around with my bestie as we compared notes on how menopause was wreaking havoc on all our body parts. We were laughing hysterically as each of us tried to one-up each other with hilarious scenarios about who had it worse. I summed up our conversation by saying, “You can’t even make this shyteup” and decided I should write about it. Ladies who have ‘been there, done that’ can relate, and hopefully find the humor in it. Surprisingly, that book gained quite a few male readers who were curious to learn what their partner’s craziness was all about. LOL.
My book, Have Bags, Will Travel, was a fun write recounting some of my more humorous escapes and learning lessons on travel. And my latest book, Twenty Years: After “I Do” was inspired by my wanting to write a tribute to my marriage on how to keep a marriage alive and thriving when life throws curve balls.
jjspina: You have some powerful books, Debby. I look forward to reading your latest one. It coming up on my TBR list soon.
What projects are you currently working on?
Since I began publishing, I’ve put out 1-2 books a year, but last year was a chaotic year right up until this past winter. I told myself I wanted to take a year off from book writing. I had lost my book writing mojo temporarily, but thankfully, it’s come back to me recently. Currently, I’m ‘turtling’ along with my next book, inspired by another conversation with a friend about how menopause has sentenced some of our parts to becoming almost unrecognizable after it’s done with us. Again, I’m aiming for humor with many relatable issues, lol. Hey, what can we do right? Sometimes you just gotta laugh! I’m nowhere near finished writing that book but the title is clear – The Change After the Change.
Jjspina: I’m sure it will be fabulous as all the others.
What is your target audience for your book?
That’s an interesting question, Janice. Initially, I thought I was writing for a mature female audience. As it turned out. It seems many younger women enjoy my books and surprisingly, quite a few males. I admit, writing personal things about ‘women parts’ was intimidating for me after discovering that men were reading my books too. But I was enlightened by this and happy to learn that men wanted to try and understand what women went through with the mystifying menopause and are also eager to learn more about relationship issues from reading my books.
Jjspina: I hope those male readers learned something helpful in understanding women. Lol!
What advice would you give prospective authors?
Write for the love of writing. Write because it’s your passion. Don’t go into publishing thinking your book is going to be a bestseller and you’re going to get rich because it probably won’t and you probably won’t. Write and build a platform of followers and readers by opening a blog and engaging with readers. Post engaging articles on your blogs and on social media. Build your tribe and have them waiting and wanting to read that first book you publish, and then continue writing and engaging. If we have any aspirations of fame or fortune, with a little luck and a lot of social interaction, we can establish a presence for both – ourselves and our books.
jjspina: Wonderful advice, Debby.
If you could have one wish, what would it be?
I could think of many wishes, but my only wish is for good health. Without it absolutely nothing else would matter. All the money in the world cannot buy health.
Jjspina: That is so true, Debby. I wish that for you, my friend.
What would you do if you were not a writer?
I can’t even imagine life without writing. I’ve been writing since I was 6 years old. I suppose if I couldn’t write I’d probably be blabbing a lot more and spending way more money on socializing and shopping (my weakness). The extrovert in me thrives on communication so if I can’t write, I’m going to tell you what’s in my head anyway.
Jjspina: I believe you would be productive either way. Lol!
Thank you again Janice for inviting me over to share a bit about myself here on your beautiful blog. 😊
It was my pleasure, Debby. I enjoyed learning more about you and your fabulous books.
“Somehow I believed it was my obligation to try to do the right thing by her because she had given birth to me.”
Conflicted Hearts is a heartfelt journey of self-discovery and acceptance, an exploration of the quest for solace from emotional guilt.
P.S. I Forgive You
“I hurt for her. She wasn’t much of a mother, but she was still my mother.”
After struggling for decades to break free, Kaye has severed the unhealthy ties that bound her to her dominating mother—but now Kaye battles new confliction, as the guilt she harbors over her decision only increases as the end of her mother’s life draws near.
Twenty Years: After “I Do”
Twenty years began with a promise. As Kaye recounts what transpired within that time, she shows that true love has no limits, even when one spouse ages ahead of the other.
Words We Carry
“I have been a great critic of myself for most of my life, and I was darned good at it, deflating my own ego without the help of anyone else.”
Words We Carry is a raw, personal accounting of how the author overcame the demons of low self-esteem with the determination to learn to love herself.
MenoWhat? A Memoir
“I often found myself drifting from a state of normal in a sudden twist of bitchiness.”
From PMS to menopause to what the hell?
Join D.G. on her meno-journey to slay the dragons of menopause as she tries to hold on to her sanity, memory, hair, and so much more.
Have Bags, Will Travel
In her quest to keep from tipping the scales, D.G. strives to devise new tricks to fit everything in her suitcases on each trip. Why is she consistently a target for Canada customs on her return journeys?
Click on these links to visit D.G. Kaye’s books:
D.G. Kaye’s Bio:
Debby Gies is a Canadian nonfiction/memoir author who writes under the pen name of D.G. Kaye. She was born, raised, and resides in Toronto, Canada. Kaye writes about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues.
D.G. writes to inspire others. Her writing encompasses stories taken from events she encountered in her own life, and she shares the lessons taken from them. Her sunny outlook on life developed from learning to overcome challenges in her life, and finding the upside from those situations, while practicing gratitude for all the positives.
When Kaye isn’t writing intimate memoirs, she brings her natural sense of humor into her other works. She loves to laugh and self- medicate with a daily dose of humor.
Please feel free to connect with D.G. Kaye on social media and any of my author and blog pages at:
www.twitter.com/@pokercubster (Of course there’s a story to this name!)
Come join our Literary Diva’s Library Facebook group for writers and authors.
I read a few of D.G. Kaye’s books and thoroughly enjoyed them. Here are two of my reviews.
on January 6, 2017. 5 stars *****
P.S. I Forgive You: A Broken Legacy is a journal of a rollercoaster of emotions displayed by this author as she deals with a narcissistic mother. This is a journey through life to survive without love and care from a mother who was incapable of loving anyone but herself.
The author opens her heart to the reader as her emotions pour out. She does all she can to make amends but to no avail and is forced to forgive her unfeeling mother and repair the damage done to her and her siblings.
This book is a catharsis to anyone who has had to live with this kind of parent. It helps them deal with the myriad of emotions that continue to bubble up inside and threaten to suffocate oneself.
My heart goes out to this child and her siblings who somehow managed to be strong and resilient even though they were never taught the essentials of parenting and the love that is needed to bring up a child. The author has shown remarkable strength and courage to face head-on the torments that continually threaten her very soul. I recommend this book to anyone who has yet to feel closure from an unhealthy relationship.
on November 20, 2016 5 Stars *****
Conflicted Hearts is a story of an amazing woman who had to endure hardships throughout her life beginning with a heartless mother. As a young child she learned how to survive and make her way without her mother’s love.
This author poured out her heart in a cathartic way in order to deal with telling her story. She has faced adversity, serious illness both herself and her husband’s and somehow came out stronger.
Reading this book has been an eye opener for me. We all have to deal with our own demons and disappointments in life but it is how we handle them and come out on top, stronger and more resilient is what matters. I would highly recommend this book!
Thank you, readers, for stopping by to read about this talented author. Please check out her fabulous books on the above links and follow her on social media.
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